1. |
Ode to Joanna
01:46
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Joanna Lumley
Don't say a word
We hate you
Joanna Lumley
Voice be deterred
We hate you
Don't dare smile, you sick donkey-slut
-
Joanna Lumley
Voice like a poo
We hate you
Joanna Lumley
A real soft poo
We hate you
Bono helps people too, fuck you
Quirky ads
Posh whimsy
Sway the lads
S'toss to me
Joanna Lumley
(We hate you)
(We hate you)
Joanna Lumley
(We hate you)
(We hate you)
Oh Lumley
The rage takes over me
Oh Lumley
Blood boils
What do you do to me?
-
What do you do to me?
Something about you, can't you see?
-
It's your appearance
It's all your gestures
It's how you're spoken
My rage awoken
Blood boils inside
Wounds open wide
Everything about you, I just can't abide
Joanna Lumley
We hate you
We hate you
Joanna Lumley, we hate you, yes
We hate you
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2. |
Don't Keep
00:20
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Don't Keep
Don't Keep
Don't
Don't Keep, you fucking spastic mong!
Don't Keep
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3. |
Pony Bastard
01:01
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What's wrong with you pony bastards?
Rainbow' would choose cancer over you
Are you sincere of its merits
or are you just a pervert?
Neckbearded
and dead inside
End your life
Your life is tragic
but friendship is magic
(My lil pony)
Cum-stained girls plush toys
Such great friends give such joys
Bide your time, the day's round the corner...
Reach the convention
with regal ascension
(My lil pony)
You're king of the bronies
enclosed by your cronies
You can't be stopped now
In numbers you're all t' more cretinous
(Preparing launch)
Your disgusting culture must end
(Launch in 3-2-1)
Face your demise
Brony
scum
BOOM!
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4. |
Aim for the Hart
01:37
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Aim for the Hart
Oh so clumsy
Oh she did a fart, haha
Lonely, middle-aged women rejoice
We've got another large lady,
a self-deprecating voice
Aim for the Hart
Talk about slapstick
Slapped with the ugly stick, hoho
Forget the sexist bile
We just dislike her style
Aim for the Hart
Miranda Hart
Trite is your art
Esteem's depart
Expect it
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5. |
Scrump Circle
01:09
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Racist skinheads
and burly goons
traitorous thieves
and violent loons
Olob meatheads
in Tapout shirts
Women beaters
No just deserts
Oppressive filth
where do you go?
What do you think
when you're alone?
We found your home
Your scum HQ
Took a look inside
and there was you...
[solo]
Orderly
Gathered in shape
A scrump circle
Scumbag incestuous rape
Dressed in drag
-
pouting your lips
A drag queen blitz
You prance around looking like
Nanny McPhee
-
An orgy of fits
Wanking your bits
It's a scruuump-
Ciiiiiircllllle
It's a scrump circle
For all the hurtful
We can see all your repressions
Hidden urges
It's a scrump circle
For all the hurtful
Woah!
It's a scrump circle
For all the hurtful
All the things that you look down on
The scrump circle is where it's going on
You are bumming redress
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6. |
Glitter
01:59
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Glitter
No
Glitter
No
Glitter
Granules of pure death
sparkling a whore's depth
Glitter
Stuck to me
Reflective particles
Stick on artsy fools
Wasteful and distasteful
and disgraceful
I don't want a face-full
It drives me up the walls
Shine out without the tools
Don't sprinkle me
with that sleaze
Flashy specks of blasphemy
Robots shimmer and shine
Not you
Glitter
Litter
not fit for the shitter
No place is safe for me
It gets in far too deep
Glitter
(Glitter)
Artificial, tacky grains
Grains of pure death
caught in my breath
[solo]
ARGH!
Don't give me glitter;
shit show-off sand
Get that skivvy, pseudo-pixie, mirror-ball reject shit
away from me
Don't sprinkle me
with your gaudy
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7. |
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Humor's got a place like all things
Be aware of the pain it can sometimes bring
A joke to you might not be so funny
So take the time and think it out
before you open up your mouth
I can't believe the things we say
A cutting word can ruin days
I can't believe the things we say
Now I wish I hadn't spoke
Can't you learn to take a fucking joke
We say things we don't mean but friends understand
Respect and humour don't always go hand in hand
A joke to you might not be so funny
So take the time and think it out
before you open up your mouth
I can't believe the things we say
A cutting word can ruin days
I can't believe the things we say
Now I wish I hadn't spoke
Can't you learn to take a fucking joke
But no one's laughing
I wish that I can crack a smile but I can't
I know he's just a fucking jerk
But jerks hurt too
And I'm not that cool that I can laugh
I see because it's happened to me
And I think I was an arsehole when I said what I said
It's just a sick sense of humour rolls 'round in my head
'Cause we've had our fun at your expense and that's wrong
and we know it
You said we were friends
For friendship's sake
let's give it a break
I can't believe the things we say
A cutting word can ruin days
I can't believe the things we say
Now I wish I hadn't spoke
Can't you learn to take a fucking joke
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8. |
WoW
00:58
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You think you're winning
The world keeps on spinning
Everyone's out sinning
-
While you're hoarding gold
Buy new things, you're told
But really they're old
Each and every raid
No life is here to be made
Will it drop this time?
Who gives a fuck
If you're looking for fun
You're shit out of luck
Shit for a monthly fee
Get a colostomy
You're really lost to me
-
You are too blind to see
Moderation is key
M.M.O.R.P.G!
Exploring digital lands
(that look like) Disney and Comic Sans
Reached level 99
Who gives a fuck
If you're looking for fun
You're Shit out of luck
WoW!
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9. |
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Banana break
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10. |
My Ingerland
01:12
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"Get outta my country"
"Just speaking my mind"
Your mind is wrong
Starved of air too long
Your hatred is blind
fed from litter you find
Minority is not majority
What gives you the authority?
Your views are far-right:
yeah, far from what is right, m8
Walk far right off a cliff, son...
E-D-L? More liiike E-D-ot! Whey-hey! Ho!
"They took the cleaner job at KFC I wanted, WAaAH!
Best burn it down with the extremist cunt."
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11. |
OLOB
00:09
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OLOB
Overly lad
Overly Bro
Overly lad
Overly Bro
OLOB
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12. |
SLAVES (Wonder Showzen)
00:14
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(SLAVES)
Built the pyramids
(SLAVES)
Built the parthanon
(SLAVES)
Built America
(SLAVES)
This is your song, thank you
(SLAVES)
Thank you
(SLAVES)
Thank you
(SLAVES)
(SLAVES)
This is your song, thank you
Slaves
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13. |
Van Halen
01:22
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I brought my pencil
I will write on your eye
You got it bad
(You got it bad)
You are hot for death
disease
infections for your sleaze
Go ahead and jump off a bridge
It's not the '80s anymore
We've all heard solos before
No line of girls at your door
split-jump and shit starts to pour
Thanks a bunch for Bill & Ted
but please stop living, please be dead
Forty years of tapping
Guitars looking like Christmas wrapping
Van Halen
Can't save 'em
Die
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14. |
Stomp it Dead
00:02
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Stomp it dead!
Ergh!
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15. |
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[solo]
H'yeaagh!
Check it, Brother Dime
Ain't got shit on my groove, Bootsy
For the Confederacy
HELL YEAH!
Whiskey at the ready
and some bud to keep us steady
Got my cowboy hat and boots
Let's go
-
Never seen a southern state
and heard Pantera years too late
I miss Dime
Rebel meets rusty chainsaw
A redneck from Redditch
The closest cowboys to you
are dodgey plumbers overcharging gran
-
If you say Getcha pull one more time
I'll pull the cord and you will meet Dime
Rebel meets rusty chainsaw
Rebel meets rusty chainsaw
Rebel meets rusty chainsaw
Rebel meets
Rebel meets
Rebel meets
Zakk Wylde!
H'yeah
Whisky
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16. |
Beaten
00:39
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I am beaten, ahh
UGH
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17. |
Sorry Pt.1
01:26
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We're sorry
We're sorry
You shouldn't waste your time
Don't waste your life on hate
Live your life
Sorry
Live your life
Peace and love
We're sorry
Compassion for other people's feelings
Peace and love
We're sorry
Really sorry
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I Hate Joanna Lumley Brighton, UK
Probably the fifth greatest Joanna Lumley themed band in all of South-East England.
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